Thoughts for the night

I was looking at another blog where a girl and had handwritten some quotes and caught myself saying, “I wish I had good handwriting and could do something like that”. That’s when I realized it. I constantly find myself wishing to have the gifts that others have instead of being content or even excited about the gifts God has given me. I used to be completely sure about what all God had gifted me with, but for a while now I have been unsure of those but also of my God-given dreams…

My Disney World planning DVD came in the mail today. If you are close to me at all you will know I have been dreaming of going to Disney for YEARS now. To say I was excited is an understatement. I watched it not once but TWICE today. Once alone while magic pixie dust exploded from every ounce of my being, and then another time with my husband tonight (which I took notes of while I was watching – this is serious business folks!) Tonight as I got ready I couldn’t help but think about more dreams. All of my dreams – pretty much everything I have ever dreamed of actually – have come true. I graduated high school, graduated from college with my bachelor’s degree, got married to the love of my life, and I now have a daughter. The end. Except wait, its not the end. I got my dream, now, how do I go about living within the dream. That seems to be my difficulty lately. How do I now live my life? So, this led to an ultimatum for me….

Thoughts for the night:
I am slowly realizing that I have got to stop comparing my life to other people’s. My marriage, my child, my relationships, my lifestyle, my desires: all these have been uniquely woven into my and it is time to start treating them as such: unique. The time has come to quit looking upon others with envy and live my own life and dreams as God intended. I have to stop using others as my scale, and let only God measure me. My relationship with Him, my relationship with my husband and family, and my relationships with others will NOT look like anyone else’s, and I MUST be content with that. My choices must be my own, made my myself (and God and my husband), and cannot be based off anyone else’s lifestyle but my own. It is time to stop doing what is the “popular” choice, or the majority opinion, and instead do what is right for my family, ordained by God. This life is my own, I only get a short time to live it, and instead of looking around I need only to look Up. ‍‌‌‌‌‍‌‌❤

Definitely easier said than done, but totally possible and necessary. So, my prayer is for God to put a new dream inside me, and no I don’t mean a “Disney World dream (though I am still super stoked about going to ” the happiest place on earth”!!!). No, I mean an impact-the-world-or-at-least-those-around-me-and-my-community dream. I once used to dream of being a writer and speaker and traveling to do this to impact other women. So maybe I’ll start there… Goodnight! =D


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